Since I started this blog ( a WHOLE couple of days ago) many people have reached out to me and said that, they had no idea, about my depression. Here's the thing, it was called a secret for a reason. I tried for many years to hide it. I tried for many years to outrun it. It seems both of those approaches are NOT working. Maybe if I go at it head on and talk about it, it might just get better.
It's hard to admit, its like in our house we don't say the 2 D's- Deployment and Depression. It's almost like out of sight out of mind. Once again it doesn't work that way. 1. Depression is already a reality for me, and 2. Deployment will be a reality soon enough. The people who knew were basically the people I couldn't hide it from. I am sure looking back on it there are signs. Hindsight is always 20/20. But that's not me. I like the fact that people don't think of me as "Sara the girl with depression" Depression has taken a lot from me over the years. It has taken my motivation, my rational thinking, my social interaction, my feelings. I don't want it to take my identity as well.
Some people have also asked me about depression. If you think you have it, I would say go to a Doctor to find out for sure. This would also make me a hypocrite. My reasons for not going to the doctor, are my own.
Maybe in another blog I will tell the world about that! I will say that it takes courage to seek out answers to your questions. If you don't want to talk to a doctor, talk to someone you trust. Or talk to me. I have lived it, and studied it.
But enough about depression for now! Tomorrow I will write about something fun. I just wanted to get some things off my chest.
I have also struggled with depression, I use to be in a really bad relationship and it made me incredibly depressed, I started taking prozac. After that relationship ended I no longer needed it, however I sometimes feel like it follows me, little spurts here and there. I think Deployment, and underways and other navy related things can make you go a little crazy, for me at least. It makes it really hard to be happy when the one thing you love is being ripped from you. So i understand how you're feeling.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment the other day, I appreciate it :-)